A Whole Lot More

These are my stories... A bit stupid, a bit deep, a bit funny and all real.

Thursday, December 15, 2005

Life in Sydney - Part 2

Hello everybody !
So here we go again...

I had a feeling today would be the day that I would sit down and write a long email to all of you. This is becouse of an interesting chat I had with a soulmate of mine from Chicago. A guy called Michael, which I met on a very strange flight from St Petersburg to Moscow, around a year ago. I promised Michael that I would try to connect to at least one person on the beach today and see what happens. I was heading there alone and was planning on reading a book and not really approaching anyone, if the situation wouldn't pop up by itself. It feels very awkward to approach anyone on the beach. I feel like somebody called Julio, except that I am not really tanned, don't own a gym card and don't own a pink pair of speedos. But hey, a promise is a promise, and I keep my promises.

So! I sit on the beach, reading my book, looking around for people that have their inner bluetooth open for reception. No one. As you probably already guessed, I was mainly looking for hot and sexy connectable women. Not that it was what we discussed with Michael... Then this long legged, silicone breasted, tanned, asian beauty walks by me, gives me a look and spreads her towel about 5 meters from where I am sitting. The first thing that jumps to my head is, that it has to be a man. Or was it ??? If she was, then one with an extremely good surgeon ! We echanged more looks from time to time and I felt hmmmmh... I think 'scared' might be the right word. What if I go to talk to her/him and we click and HeShe invites me to come to her place for a asian tea or something ??? Would I ever be ready to take the risk? NO FUCKIN WAY! At this point I really wished I had my laptop with me, so I could google "how to recognize a shemail". But I didn't.

After frying myself on the beach for some time and looking around for any other interesting people around me, I came to the conclusion that there couldn't really be anyone more interesting then this thing next to me. I meen, if she was a man in the past, then I am sure she has a lot of interesting stories and experiences. And if she wasn't, then she is just another girl, with a big mouth and wide shoulders. Around this time a seagull shat on my back. Someone told me that is a sign of good luck. Getting shat on, by a seagull is not my idea of luck, but anyhow! I went to wash my back and then headed towards HeShe, introduced myself and sat down next to her. I hoped her name would had been JAMES or CHAD or something like that, as it would have made things easier, but it wasn't. I can't remember her name, but it was something like Susan. Nothing super transvestity like Roxy or Cleo, which would had been a giveaway too. She did have a very firm handshake though.

So we went ahead with the usual 'where you from, what you do, why you are here, how long are you here for' and bla bla bla... She was from Bali, which did help the conversation flow, but there were no sparks and no real chemistry. There were a lot of signs saying that she was really a woman, which was a real pity. Women are much less interesting then HeShes. Poor girl, she must have people trying to figure out her gender all the time and never really interested in the lovely girl that is inside of her.

Well, I still don't know which one she is, but I am proud of myself of taking the step and talking to her. This story has no point really. Sorry for wasting your time :)

I will write you more stories soon. Especially ones that have a meaning. I am feeling much more comfortable here and learning lots about the city and the people that live in it. The adventure continues...


I love you and miss you all.
Oded

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Life in Sydney - Part 1

Hi my loved ones!

So here we go again… Sorry for taking soooo long before writing the first chapter of my new journey. I just checked my flight itinerary and realized I have been away from home for 3 weeks! That’s almost a month! It really took me some time to settle in, and feel comfortable enough to give myself time to sit down and write this. As you, my loved ones know, I can’t really let “important” things slide and these things bother me, until they have been taken care of. Now I feel like most of them have been taken care of and am slowly starting to feel the freedom and the special vibe you get, when you are away from everything you are used to.

When I arrived to Sydney, I was picked up by a small Korean DJ/promoter (he booked Guy to play in Seoul once, but studies and lives here) and his Gay Australian boyfriend. They took me to their apartment in Surry Hills, the “soho” aka gayland of Sydney. We watched the finals of Australian Idols on my first night here and held hands when they FINALLY told who was the winner. After that there were some really cool fireworks over the famous operahouse, which we could see very well from their balcony. Quite a nice welcome, as a matter of fact.

Somehow I didn’t feel that comfortable with them two and the small Korean leather sofa, so the day after I moved to a dirty little room in Bondi. You might have heard of the famous Bondi beach, which is the most touristy and backpackerish beach in Australia. The house was filled with really nice Swedish people, whom I had heard of through my other Swedish friends that I met in Bali. It’s a really small world, when you are traveling...

Besides getting bitten by all kinds of small creatures, watching some hot doghumping every morning and doing my world famous Swedish imitation (which all Swedes seem to hate), I spent a lot of the time looking for a decent place to stay. I wanted something more central, so it would be easier for me to do my work… As much as living right next to the beach and all the nice Scandinavian & Brazilian chick sounds great, it’s not what I came here for. I came here to find a nice jewish girl and marry her and her money. That’s why I moved to Double Bay, also known as Double Pay. Lots of rich bitches out here. Even Nicole Kidman lives very close. I thought of marrying her, but I think it would be very problematic. How do I tell her that I really hate her work as an actress?

So now I have a nice room, in a pretty nice house, with pretty cool flat mates, with a pretty dirty bathroom, in a pretty good location, with a cool little beach around 10 minutes from here (just came back from my first dip in the sea as a matter of fact). The only thing that I am really missing is an internet connection. This is up to my flat mate to take care of and I guess he has got more important things on his mind. Like arranging his closet and shit. Shit as in “other shit”, not sitting in the toilet and shitting. Even though he has been sitting in the toilet and shitting much more then ordering an internet connection. Anyways… I forgive him, because I am a peace-loving creature that wants to get a long with everyone. But inside I am starting to hate him.

At the moment I am waiting for the samples of the clothing brands to arrive and then start meeting with all the shops and buyers etc. Step into working mode and see how it all goes. The mainstream style here is very suitable for both brands, so I feel that they could go down extremely well… The only thing I need to do, is do a good job in selling them TO the shops, so people could go and get them. I’m pretty excited about what’s going to happen with this and can’t wait to have my first meetings. I know that I will be very nervous and I know there is a lot of competition out there. Just have to hope & believe that the brands themselves are strong enough. Well, enough about business really. It’s kind of boring. Especially as nothing has happened with it yet. I will keep you posted on it in my next email.

OK everyone. I hope to hear back from all of you and miss you all very much. Life is so different when you don’t have your family and your close friends around you. I don’t think that anyone should live like that for too long. Hmmmmh, so what am I doing here? Well, I guess I have to find a REALLY rich Jewish girl and fly all of you down here. The fact that it is summer here from November to around April is really great and the idea of spending two summers every year is still very appealing to me. I also know that this trip, will once again teach me a lot about myself and about life. About washing my clothes and going to the grocery shop by myself. About understanding that if I don’t buy salt from the shop, it will just not be there and my avocado toast will taste like something is missing.


It should take around 7 to 14 working days to get the internet working and then I promise to send emails more often and be online for skypeing and MSNning with all you geeks !

Here are al my details, so you would have no excuse for not staying in touch with me:
Mobile: +61 00000000000 (My phone is on mute, when I’m sleeping, so you can call me anytime).
Home: +61 222222222222 (check out the time differential before using this one)

Skype: miscmanagement
MSN: miscmanagement(at)hotmail.com
Email: oded(at)awholelotmore.net

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